We all know the sayings: “Live in the moment.” “Today is a gift and that’s why we call it the present.” “Focus on the here and now.”

I call BS.

In a power-hungry age where everyone is constantly “doing something,” it seems as though the present simply doesn’t exist. The second I am done with one assignment or just as I have lined up a new job for next summer, “what’s next” is the immediate next thought. Sometimes I ask it myself, but often, it’s everyone else around me.

Now, this is not always a harmful habit. Of course, it is important to set goals, stay motivated, and find some sort of direction or passion. But, too much of anything is bad, right?

Maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s the constant pressure I put on myself to be “perfect.” Maybe other people are able to actually live in the moment. Maybe this is just the way life is.

Most of my anxiety comes from right there. I stress about stressful situations, but then stress out more about how much I’m stressing out because no one else is stressing and there must be something wrong with me. Right? *big gasp*

But no.

Why is it that those sayings can’t truly be lived and learned? Why do we put up a façade of peace, mental wellness, and “being present” when the whole world knows this isn’t the reality? I refuse to accept the fact that this could be normal.

In my short, almost 19 years of life, I have been conditioned to believe that if I don’t know what I am doing tomorrow, what my major and extracurriculars are for four years, or what I am kinda sorta going to be doing with my life then woah, woah, woah. RED FLAG.

But, on the other side, some people say, “Only 19?? You have your whole life ahead of you. Be adventurous. Be spontaneous. Live a little.” So, how exactly am I supposed to be spontaneous, but also have my entire life planned out? Seems like a pretty stressful conflict, if you ask me.

And, what if I just want to do nothing? When is it appropriate to curl up with my favorite blanket and binge watch my guilty pleasure (Law & Order SVU :)) or read for fun?

No one knows when their next big idea will hit them or when they will stumble upon their passion. So, stop asking me what I’m doing next summer, next month, or even tomorrow. I don’t even know what I want to have for breakfast, let alone what I want to do with my life.

Although it is important to have people around you that motivate you to be your best self, it is important to make the distinction between motivating and pressuring. It is important to make this distinction.

Doing “something” does not always mean finding a good resume builder, but something that can better both your mind and body. Go for a run. Pick up a good book. Take up meditation. Do something that will make you proud and content in the moment. Be the best you can be today.

That is all anyone can ask of you right now.

By Nikki Shoichet

Duke Student, nap enthusiast, making the world trendy one outfit at a time.