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The Caffeine Chronicles

It has always been a dream of mine to be compared to Mo Farah, today’s king of long distance running. I imagined that I would connect with him on the high mileage we ran, the records we had broken (I still believe that my under-seventeen national record is comparable to his world one; I jest, but only slightly), and the hordes of sportswear brands crying out our names.

 

Oh, such feeble dreams, such hefty ambitions. Now, standing on the race-line a rather drained and washed up young adult, it appears that the legend and I only have one thing in common: our pre-race caffeine ritual.

 

When I was fifteen, I was introduced to my first coffee. It was a milky, foamy latte saturated with a sweet caramel syrup that congealed at the bottom of the cup. It wasn’t the most dazzling debut of the stimulant, but I found myself returning everyday between classes for a hit. A few years down the line, I transitioned away from the saccharine, coffee-infused milk to cappuccinos, then flat whites, and then eventually the reliable Americano.

 

I had never really believed in the myth of caffeine dependency until I realized that I myself was dependent. Upon entering college, I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning without it, I wouldn’t show up to a midterm without a cup by my side, and I certainly wouldn’t race without my three espresso shots. One for each hour before the race.

 

Sadly, the espresso shots were my only commonality with the Olympian. I don’t know whether Farah got the stomach aches, the shaking hands, or the headaches that came with it, or whether, like me, he looked for alternatives.

 

I hate Red Bull or anything in those brightly colored aluminum cans. They are too reminiscent of evenings lost at frat parties listening to the same fifteen minutes of the most recent Big Bootie Remix. So, when I discovered NeuroGum, I was pleasantly surprised.

 

I will admit, the cold-compressed gum made with natural green tea extract and B vitamins doesn’t sound great on paper. Chewable caffeine frankly sounds rancid. However, coming from a young woman who goes through a good few packs of gum a day and has Trident and Orbit multipacks on her Christmas list every year, it’s actually pretty good. The hit isn’t as visceral as an espresso shot – I feel focused without the jitters of a coffee or the sugar crash from a urine colored energy drink.

 

In a few months, I will be putting my racing spikes on for the first time in almost a year. Maybe with a couple of sustainably sourced pieces of gum in my back pocket, me and Mo Farah might finally find a little bit more in common.

 

 By Sophia Parvizi-Wayne

Duke Student, leader of national campaign on mental health, Cross Country All-ACC, fashion alchemist, Huffington Post writer, and all-around world-runner

Photography by John Martin