Relationship Ruin: Pandemic Edition

Over fried pickles and cheese fries, I watched my semester end as COVID took over. I sat at a table with my friends, not knowing that it would be the last time, and talked about the pandemic that plagued the headlines.

Spring break had been extended to two weeks, which at the time seemed like the much-needed break from the campus and midterms I wanted. However, we didn’t know that this break from campus meant we wouldn’t come back for the rest of the semester or for the following hybrid semester. 

The separation from people who I spent upwards of ten hours a day with was difficult. Everyone started out strong and was fascinated by Zoom; we had weekly Zoom parties and played games until the sun came up. Yet, as the semester closed and people were irritable from being confined with their parents for two months, communication dwindled.

When the fall semester started, nothing was the same as how we left it. We didn’t leave our apartments except to go to the grocery store, and we were suffocated by the beige walls of West Campus housing. While my university declared there would be no in-person graduation ceremonies for the Fall 2020 semester, football games still went on like nothing had changed. Because my university set this precedent, students stopped taking COVID so seriously.

For the first football game of the season, various groups threw parties and tailgates with dozens of people, supplying everything except a mask. COVID cases at my school skyrocketed but that didn’t stop people from flooding the bars downtown. College kids were willing to risk sickness and death to have the college experience and nothing would stop them.

So many people I knew continued to go to parties, kickbacks, and all of the bars. COVID cases grew rapidly and it felt like you couldn’t see anyone without potentially getting sick and spreading it. I was trying desperately to be safe and cautious because I work in the service industry and if I got sick it would shut my place of work down, but it caused me to isolate myself.

Everyone began policing each other. Up in each other’s business about where they had been and who they had seen, it was easy to get frustrated. Before COVID we could come and go and do what we pleased without a second thought, but now roommates needed to know your life story in order to protect their own. The strain this posed on roommates and friends was infuriating. We felt like we had no privacy, even though it was for the safety of others.

I would be lying if I said I didn’t lose friends during the pandemic. A lot of it was because of the lack of communication and face-to-face interaction we were used to daily, yet a handful were because we approached the pandemic differently. Wanting the college experience is valid. I want it too, but I can’t consciously go out and risk getting COVID. There is more to life than partying, drinking, and having a good time, and a lot of people couldn’t understand that during the last nine months. 

Many of us learned to love ourselves and be alone during the pandemic. That doesn’t mean we want to be alone. Just like friendships, romantic relationships have dwindled and suffered. Relationships are healthy and necessary and COVID stripped us of that in so many ways.

Unless you fall in love over a Zoom square, it’s nearly impossible to meet people organically nowadays. Romantic relationships are already hard to come by and the pandemic made it more complicated. Everyone seems to have jumped headfirst into dating apps and hoped for the best.

Before COVID, casual dating was the norm. Going out and doing activities fueled relationships and gave them a reason to continue. However, the pandemic took away the casual conversations and busy work, and people either found interest in spending quality time and talking with their partner or drifted apart. 

In many ways COVID-19 helped me. While for months I was upset over my shattered relationships, there was a silver lining. It showed me who my true friends were and who cared about me and others. It taught me that being alone is okay and in many cases, refreshing. The strain on relationships that the pandemic has imposed was suffocating, but it didn’t leave me empty-handed. Sure, I’m still frustrated with some friends and the majority of people at my university, but I’ve also formed strong bonds and lifelong memories with those closest to me.

By Emma Bittner

Rom-Com fanatic and coffee connoisseur with a little bit of "I wanna save the world" in me.